We Were Dancing by Rebecca Ferguson

Winner, Adult Fiction, Writing Rammy 2021

It wasn’t snowing. That’s important. It wasn’t snowing but he said it was close enough and offered me his hand with a smile. Or maybe it was more a grin. It was definitely out of place, whatever it was. Definitely made me think he wanted something more than a waltz in the almost snow.

But no. He just wanted to dance.

It was dark, almost midnight I think. The only light was the bonfire we had built and reflected in his eyes it made them seem more green than brown. Not for the first time I wondered what colour they actually were, if I would ever figure it out. One of life’s more pleasant mysteries.

We’d never been that close before. That’s important, too. We’d never been that close before but then all of a sudden his hand was burning on my lower back and his fingers were interlocked with mine so tightly I thought he’d never let me go. We’d never been that close before, I didn’t know him before, but here we were at the end of the world together. We were all we had left.

Our feet began to move of their own accord in an imperfect synchronicity. Sometimes I went forward and he went sideways and he’d go to spin me but I clung too tight and we’d get tangled together for a moment. He’d laugh, low and breathy, and simply keep on dancing as if that was the only thing that mattered.

We had no music but it didn’t matter. A lot of things didn’t anymore. Eventually it became so we weren’t even really dancing at all. We just stood there swaying, both my arms round his neck, both his low around my waist, breathing in time to a melody that wasn’t there.

‘The world is ending and we’re dancing,’ I murmured. ‘Why?’

He laughed breathily and smiled. He had a dimple in his right cheek. I hadn’t noticed before. ‘Is there any other time more perfect?’

What else could we have done? Moments of happiness in the end were so fleeting that we had to take them, grab them, hold on tightly and wring them out even as they spluttered and died.

And we were happy then. We truly were. It’s hard to explain how it felt, how it could have felt in the midst of everything, but it was as though if only I held onto him, onto this moment, then everything would be alright. The clock would turn back and what was broken would heal. We would get a second chance. We’d be better this time.

We danced for a while. I don’t know how long. Animals howled not so far away and ash fell from the sky like snow and yet we were there, dancing at the end of the world as if nothing mattered, as if we were invincible.

As if we’d be alright.

If only we kept on dancing.